Discussing aging is not a popular topic! Don’t you think that most of us settle with telling ourselves, “aging beats the alternative!” I am struck with Ronald Rolheiser’s insights on aging and dying. For example, he discusses the challenges in shifting one’s perspective in our later years from the drive of the ego to self-giving. He delves into the differences between achievement and fruitfulness. Achievement emphasizes one’s personal accomplishments, one’s successes, what I have done, and one’s personal capabilities.
Of course, achievements aren’t necessarily a bad thing but they can be a lure towards grandiosity and self-centeredness. Success isn’t necessarily part of fruitfulness, rather fruitfulness is about how one relates. It goes beyond self, one’s own desires, accomplishments and is manifested in kindness, graciousness, mercy. Fruitfulness is more concerned with how other lives will be supported by my presence on this earth. What good am I leaving behind to others? The spotlight is not on me. In many instances the person’s fruitfulness is not even recognized.
When we look at figures like Rosa Parks, Dorothy Day, Oscar Romero their fruitfulness came from a commitment to love, justice and empowerment of people, most of whom were dispossessed. So much of the world’s true fruitfulness remains hidden. However, if we delve deeper are there not persons each of us know who live fruitful and inspiring lives? In the past few months four sisters have died. Each was an achiever in her own way. Yet the testimonies shared at their vigils, the notes written to the community and the reflections posted on Facebook spoke less about their accomplishment than their fruitfulness: their relationships, their kindness, their ability to listen and care. What people remembered was not simply what they had done, but who they had been for others.
Being fruitful becomes an invitation to discover a different measure of a life.
Insane for the Light by Ronald Rolheiser
